it's better with butter

Today, in my health ed class, I had a super weird/funny moment. We were talking about sexual health behaviours, like using condoms and what not and we watched a video on HIV/AIDS. It was the usual 80s high school video, it had some doctors, some celebrities (Magic, Paula Abdul, the cast of Beverly Hills 90210, etc.), and people with AIDS. The funny part was when the doctor was talking about lubes and condoms. He said to use water-based lubes, like KY, and not to use oil based lubes. When he was about to give examples of the oil-based lubes, I (and probably everyone else in the class) were thinking of the usual suspect, the Vaseline. But no, he said not to use Crisco and butter as lube! Hahahahaha, the whole class broke out in chuckles. So many lines of dialogue just went thought my head right then.

Man: "Dayyyyymn girl, you getting a little dry. You got some Crisco?"
Woman: "Oh no, I don't cook with oil, but I have some butter."
M: "A'ight, I'll go grab that. Oh nice, you have some Becel, I heard that it's healthier than butter."
W: "Yeah, let's use the Becel. It's expensive though, so just use a little bit."
M: "Okay, hey, where's your butter knife?"

Shit, I could write a whole play...




...maybe even a musical.